I’m too busy with wedding bullshit to write my wedding blog (58 days to the wedding, holyfuck) but I’m still writing my Hitched column for the Frisky, so I’ve got two new ones for you: first, there’s my take on the obnoxious “reluctant groom” myth, wherein men supposedly have to be dragged kicking and screaming to the altar:
If men actually were forced into marriage against their will, it wouldn’t be a cute cake topper, because nobody would put a rape joke on top of their wedding cake. Funny thing is, I can think of a group of people who, for pretty much the entirety of human history, have been denied agency and as a result, sold or coerced into marriages as a way to solidify political gains, make money and secure property, and guess the f**k what, guys? That group isn’t “men.” It’s women. After all, the question “Who gives this woman in marriage?” isn’t rooted in tender father-daughter tradition. It’s a sales transaction.
And on a more light-hearted note, my recurring wedding nightmares led me to ask my now-married friends about their own wedding disasters:
Hoping to exorcise some pre-wedding demons, I asked my hitched friends: did you experience any wedding disasters? The best response? From my musically gifted friend Mikal: “Does being knocked up at your wedding count?” But seriously, folks. I wanted to know: when even the best planning goes awry, does it actually matter, or will we all look back later and laugh? The consensus seems to be: both.
Missed some Hitched? Here’s the whole archive at the Frisky.