Denton MILFest 2011: Vomit barf puke vomit barf puke vomit

Vomit. Puke barf. Vomit barf. Yarf vom. Retch spew. Vomit. Retch.

Vomit vomit barf vomit yarf barf vomit. Hurk vomit barf hurky vomit. Blech vomit hack vomit barf barf yarf. Vomit yarf. Barf barf barf. Puke vomit retch. Spew vomit. Herk vomit retch. Yarf retch. Upchuck vomit barf. Vomit barf barf. Herk barf retch upchuck vomit spew. Barf barf spew spew vomit retch spew barf vomit barf.



About andrea grimes

Andrea is a journalist living in Austin, TX. She has a master's degree in anthropology and did her thesis work on gender and stand-up comedy. Seriously. Also, she has a bunch of cats. Three of them. Is three a bunch? Discuss.
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88 Responses to Denton MILFest 2011: Vomit barf puke vomit barf puke vomit

  1. This is maybe the best blog entry I’ve seen today.

  2. Sarah Crane says:

    I will be outside picketing with my church group.

  3. some dude says:

    interesting take. im curious to read more of your insightful opinions.

  4. I’m not sure how this is gross… It’s a rock show with a beauty pageant for women who’ve had children held the day before mother’s day. If anything, it’s empowering to women. You should go.

    • Richard, since you’re the organizer of the event, I’m going to try and explain this to you from my perspective, since I think it sounds like you may not genuinely understand why “MILFest” is sexist, demeaning and insulting to women. And that’s fine. A lot of people don’t think critically about things that are meant to be silly jokes or just for fun.

      Just because something is for fun, or meant to be silly, doesn’t mean it doesn’t reinforce stereotypes and unreasonable gendered expectations and exploit a marginalized group for the amusement of the dominant group.

      Here, the marginalized group is women. The non-marginalized group is men. I hope you can agree with me that women are marginalized and discriminated against in the world, and that sexism exists. Ok? Ok.

      I’m going to go off your own quote, based on what I read on Pegasus News:

      “Basically, what makes you a Queen MILF goes beyond mere beauty. Of course that plays a huge hand in it, but there’s other stuff too,” he said. “Your ability to drink large amounts of libations, the ability to dance like there’s no tomorrow, and a true Queen MILF knows how to party. She exudes sex, but doesn’t come across as slutty. The Queen MILF is a goddess.””

      1. “Mere beauty” that “plays a huge hand” – I think your second statement belies your first. Pageants generally reinforce the idea that women’s predominant value is measured in how attractive they are in terms of their appeal to heterosexual men. Values and attributes such as how smart they are, the quality of work they do, the quality of their mothering skills or how good they are at sports all come secondary to the primary goal foisted upon all women, which is to be attractive to men. This creates an unequal system wherein unreasonable and unattainable beauty standards are upheld for women and rarely, if at all, for men.

      2. Ability to drink, dance, and party. I know this is part of the joke, because traditional pageants would never measure these skills. I get that. But we’re also talking about a “mom” contest. Modern moms are asked to do a lot of things. In fact, they’re pressured to do and be just about everything. You’re asking moms to be drinkers, dancers and partiers and to not think about tomorrow. However, in our society, moms who actually DO drink, dance and party without thinking of the consequences are seen as inadequate mothers and deeply shamed for such. The same does not go for dads, who are allowed quite a bit of leeway in their child-like, immature behavior. (See: The Hangover, Grown-Ups.) With this pageant, you’re reinforcing the ideas that moms (and women) are damned if they do, and damned if they don’t.

      3. “She exudes sex, but doesn’t come across as slutty.” – This is perhaps the most damaging of all your statements. I would suggest brushing up on something called the Purity Myth (, which is basically this: women are expected to remain chaste and virginal, or else we will call them sluts, but if they do not play to our sexual desires in a culturally appropriate way, we will call them cockteases, prudes and uptight bitches. Women spend their lives trying to navigate between “virgin” and “whore,” because society seems to be unwilling to view women the same way they view men: as reasonable sexual beings for whom having and enjoying sex is a normal part of life. I challenge you to come up with an empirical measure for what is “sexy” but not “slutty” that we can all agree on: quite simply, you can’t, because both concepts are highly subjective.

      See also:

      4. “The Queen MILF is a goddess.” – No, she isn’t. The Queen MILF is a woman chosen by men for her ability to perform a certain, very narrow, kind of heterosexuality that men find appealing.

      See also:

      I really think you should look into the book Female Chauvinist Pigs for why events like this are damaging, not empowering, to women. Here’s the Wikipedia entry:

      • I’m gonna be honest. I didn’t read all that.
        But it seems like you’re passing some pretty hefty judgements about something you’ve never attended. I believe letting women make their own choices is the best way to empower them. The practice of self-governance is the highest order of power, no matter what sex.

        If you wanna go you can pay $6 at the door, or register as a contestant at this address…

      • So, to be clear, Richard, you want me to attend your event even though you can’t take ten minutes to read a thoughtful, reasonable response explaining very clearly and concisely why what you’re doing is ignorant, damaging and sexist?

        Actually, now that I write it out that way, I’m not sure I really need to have asked in the first place.

      • J says:

        Hi, my name is Richard Haskins and I am going to ignore everything you say because I am right. I think women should self-govern themselves and it really helps if they pay me to come to my event where I and other heterosexual men will ogle them and decide who is the hottest but not only the hottest because beauty isn’t everything okay but also the best dancer and drinker and who is the sexiest but not the sluttiest because I and other heterosexual mean decide who is slutty and who is sexy can you come? Even though you just gave me a lengthy explanation of why you find my event degrading you should pay me $6 to come or actually even be part of an event that you just said was degrading because I want you to and really your feelings don’t count LET ME EMPOWER YOU BY JUDGING IF YOU’RE A GODDESS (based only on physical attributes though!) WITH A BUNCH OF OTHER DUDES, WHY ARE YOU JUDGING MY EVENT?

      • Sam says:

        While I didn’t quite understand where you were going there, J, your interpretation of Richard’s comments sort of missed the meat of his post.
        Please try not to get so apoplectic about people’s opinions and hyperbolize them so much, it makes it hard to discuss things.
        Your perception of him screaming his points is concerning.

      • J says:

        Is my hyperbolization of Richard’s point (brought on by his blatant disregard for anything Andrea said and, you know, the extreme arrogance and/or stupidity shown by asking someone who nicely just laid out why they would not be interested in your event to pay to come to and be a part of your event) more or less concerning than his refusal to read an argument? I think that makes discussing things a little harder to do than some ALL CAPS INTERPRETING.

  5. subdivisions says:

    what if this turns us all into hardcore grimey fans??

  6. Yes. It’ll be really fun. There’s an awesome DJ too.

  7. organizer says:

    Participation in the event is obviously voluntary, and giving women the right to choose how they want to portray themselves is better than condemning any event that doesn’t fit into your definition of how women should be portrayed. as you said, “in our society, moms who actually DO drink, dance and party without thinking of the consequences are seen as inadequate mothers and deeply shamed for such.” Events like this may help to change that stereotype. However, the real point here is that this event is about MUSIC, not MILFs. Those who attend will be the WEE BEASTIES fans who come to every show, not sex-crazed chauvinist maniacs. So if you don’t like awesome punk music and hanging out with friends, definitely stay away.

  8. I take it you didn’t see my awesome internet video about how awesome mother’s and women are…

  9. Dmitri Karamozov says:

    hmmmmm I should tell my dad Fyodor about this event,

  10. Thesis work on “stand-up comedy”? Wow. You’re a riot.

  11. Pat Sajak says:

    Oh no, people trying to have a good time! Let’s pretend that women over the age of 35 aren’t smart enough to make decisions for themselves and are “damaging” you. This frightens you? This offends you? This damages you? You’re going to need to buy some tougher armor and realize that sexual empowerment is more than scathing book readings at coffee shops.

  12. Dmitri Karamozov says:

    Richard you guys should do an album that’s lyrically based off the Vagina Monologues

  13. Donovan says:

    Are these guys trolling? I think they might be trolling. I hope that they are trolling.

  14. Clearly no good is going to come of this conversation.

    Andrea, I respect what you do and keep on keeping on.

    If you change your mind, we’d love to have you. I think you’d be surprised at how much fun you can have when you let down your guard once in a while.

  15. contestant says:

    Hi, I have two kids, I work as a Geneticist at a University in the metroplex, and I’m a MILF-fest contestant!!! People are just trying to have fun, and censoring fun is always bad news. We could all think of many examples of blatantly sexist things our society accepts just because that’s the status quo, but as some point you gotta just let your hair down and learn how to have a good time without worrying about the far-reaching cataclysmic consequences of a MILF fest in Denton, Texas. I’m a mother, I’m responsible, I’m beautiful, and I’m ready to get down on Saturday night! If you can’t accept that then your life must be pretty boring.

    • Stephanie Rae says:

      I applaude you! You are fantastic for being apart of it and even more for speaking out about it!

  16. Donovan says:

    Does everybody here know what MILF stands for? Like at all?

    Forget it, I think you’re really onto something. Hell, while we’re at it, let’s have a Jailbait Pageant for youngsters. Or crown a Butterface Queen. There are lots of good ideas in this pile, don’t stop at MILFs

    • Mothers In Loving Families

    • Party Animal says:

      That would be a great idea. It’s too bad that Butterface’s, Jailbat, etc., don’t have holidays to conveniently tie the event in with.

      • Sam says:

        While I’m sure most everyone finds the idea of a “Jailbait Beauty Pageant” repulsive and condemnable (them being under the age of making decisions for themselves both psychologically and legally, as well as it being repulsive at the most base level for the large percentage of people who aren’t pedophiles), I don’t see what’s wrong with a “Butterface Pageant”, and I think drawing a comparison between the two is somewhat obfuscatory.

  17. Sam says:

    I agree that women shouldn’t be treated as possessions nor should they strive to be sexually attractive above all else, including, by and large, other realms of societal worth and accomplishment. It has been my observation that none of our fans promulgate such bland and tired ideas. I would love it if every lady (I know you might read that as a derogatory term, but I find it rather charming and polite) that came to our show or decided to enter this first-ever pageant held advanced degrees in Science. That would make my day; Honestly. I’m not sure why you believe that we are encouraging consummating the stereotype of a dumb, empty Barbie being the epitome of beauty or worth. Granted, some of our fans like girls with less intellectually oriented goals, but then again some of our fans don’t have many intellectually oriented goals.1

    The state of human sexuality and social interaction today is a very complicated and interesting study. Your initial reaction of mainly barf and puke sounds, while amusing, really did nothing to change what you perceive as worthy of getting physically sick over. I suggest reading . which might answer some of your questions about the current state of woman-focused sexuality without such an emotional attachment to the data at hand. Understanding the issue without being stuck in a cognitive loop is helpful to the change of any system. Just because you believe these ladies and ourselves to be part of this broken structure does not prove that you are more righteous, or moral, just with a differing opinion. Feminism, a word with many meanings and ideas behind it today, is constantly coming up with new reasons to damn others without really finding a successful answer to their stated problems. New approaches and theories are needed other than reactionary repugnance.

    1 I meant “dumb”. Sorry; Kind of a joke. There are smart ones too. It’s a mixed bag, really.

    • Sam says:

      If you highlight the blue end there, it’s a bit easier to read.

      • Sam says:

        It sparked discussion, that it did, but I don’t think in the way that you wanted. As I said, this discussion is much wider in scope than reactionary repugnance, and your willingness to mostly focus in on the pedantic banter does not serve your purpose well.

        I am interested to see how this changes things, and I hope there is the church picket, and that your cause comes to the show and pickets as well.

    • “Your initial reaction of mainly barf and puke sounds, while amusing, really did nothing to change what you perceive as worthy of getting physically sick over”

      Oh? I was under the impression it sparked discussion about why this whole thing is such a disaster, and gave me an opportunity to grab people’s attention so that I could address the issue more fully in the comments section. I don’t expect that will deter the band from hosting this event (after all, reading what I wrote is really hard, as Richard noted!) but women speaking out when they believe they’re being treated poorly is a pretty powerful agent of change.

  18. Sam says:

    Well, I messed that HTML up. More to click, respected woman persons.

  19. Andrea,

    You should come see the show, and if it’s really as bad as you think then you’ll have more ammo and more stuff to write about, because it’s happening regardless. It seems like this blog has just gotten a ton of attention.

  20. olivia says:

    I think letting moms get rowdy once in awhile is a great way to break stereotypes, social norms, and distorted beauty standards. mom’s are, i think you can agree, the unsung heroes of American society. They do everything: work, raise children, house-keep, deal with their emotionally handicapped husbands (ouch, sorry men), etc., and so why can’t they also get on stage and let loose every once in awhile? And this is an event that is organized for the sole purpose of celebrating them by making sure they have fun. Are you expecting there to be a minimum bust measurement for entry, or what? this isn’t hooters, this is a punk rock show. I sincerely hope there are several middle-aged women who hire a babysitter, drink a few beers, dance to some groovy tunes, and FEEL SEXY! They deserve a break; let them have it.

  21. Stephanie Rae says:

    Okay, I am a 23 year old woman, and have many friends with children. I am not some child who doesn’t understand the ways of the world, but I believe I have to agree with Richard. There is nothing wrong with any woman expressing herself in the means SHE finds necessary. It can be an empowerment for a woman. It may be stated in the way you may not want, but MILF is a term that can bring a smile to some women’s faces. It makes them feel desirable, while may be a little creepy, but still. Now, it may be brash and unsophisticated, but that is the point of free will. You don’t have to be apart of it, or even attend. But I will say this, almost every comment I have read, has reinforced stereotypes. Even your own post. I don’t live by stereotypes. I don’t where “slutty” clothing and am an outcast of the outcasts. I am happy being me. I was honored to be asked to be in the MILF competition, because it meant that in my regular t-shirt, baggy jeans, glasses, and with no make-up, I was still seen as beautiful and sexy. I declined because one, I don’t have children, and two, I CHOSE not to be in it.
    On another note, you state that men are excused for their childish behavior, when all you wrote about the Milfest is “barf,” “vomit,” “puke.” Question: Where making a point or just being childish?

    • If some women think it’s empowering to parade around for the express intent of making some dudes at a bar happy, then I can’t and won’t argue that what they feel is wrong. I can believe that they have a false consciousness about what it means to be empowered.

      However, I have taken care not to make this conversation about the participants in the MILF pageant–I think focusing on that takes away from the real problem, which is male organizers thinking this kind of thing is a swell idea. Focusing on the female participants causes in-fighting between the marginalized group and reinforces the authority of the non-marginalized group by taking the attention away from the perpetrators of the assbaggery.

      So, let me be clear: women, participate all you want. I genuinely hope you have fun. Seriously. Really really. No vomit barf.

      • Three of the promoters and organizers are female…

      • Stephanie Rae says:

        Who says that these women are doing it for the men? Maybe they do it for themselves. Also, the fact that women can do these events and make men drool, and not think clearly, proves just much power women have over men.
        And by making any comment about it you ARE making this conversation about the contestants. Because they are apart of this.

      • Anthropoligicalian says:

        I can believe that they have a false consciousness about what it means to be empowered.

        = BIAS.

        I think focusing on that takes away from the real problem, which is male organizers thinking this kind of thing is a swell idea. Focusing on the female participants causes in-fighting between the marginalized group and reinforces the authority of the non-marginalized group by taking the attention away from the perpetrators of the assbaggery.

        = BIAS

        Maginalization is a perspective based phenom , at best.

        If the women participating in this event for whomever (Men and women alike) chooses to enjoy its encompassed facilitation, are enjoying themselves,then how is it any les than individualized stratification of self worth?

        The object or in this case event permanence is a small layer of any individuals self worth. It is the empowerment through both specific and general action that will provide for this.

        From writing an article, to flying aplane, to dancing like theres no tomorrow, the point is not in the eventitself but what the individual takes form that root form.

        In short: People are people… Social norms set precedents.
        Precendents are merely veils of false confinement anyway… Have fun. Dont get Hurt.

      • J says:

        “Also, the fact that women can do these events and make men drool, and not think clearly, proves just much power women have over men.”
        Sorry, Stephanie, I don’t want to have power because I have tits and a pussy and because I might let some dude touch them or fuck them or because I can shake my ass or because I can drink. I’d like to be respected as a person outside of being a sex object. Also, your statement is kinda rude towards men – I’m pretty sure some guys can think clearly and reach a level past that of an adolescent having his first erection if there’s a nice-looking lady by them.

  22. Maggie says:

    I used to enjoy Wee-Beasties shows, and in fact attended quite a few of them as a supporter and fan. However, since I was singled out and publicly humiliated by Richard Haskins (whom I’ve never met) during a show as he made remarks regarding my own sexual behavior (“Maggie gives the best head”) about me in front a large crowd of my peers, I am less than convinced of his respect for women, or for anyone. The site of me crying in humiliation didn’t seem to slow him down either, and he continued as my friends quickly helped me leave the venue. It’s a shame that I will never go to another Wee Beasties show, because I would like to support my other (very talented) friends in the band.
    I think you might be wasting your time arguing with him, though. Women can go to his shows, like I did, and quickly decide if they feel that they are being respected. I for one, have never felt more disrespected by anyone in my entire life.

    • I asked who gave the best head and all your friends pointed to you. This was at Public House, wasn’t it?

      • Sam says:

        Well, the title of the song is “good head”, and is intended to be funny. Offense and comedy do certainly mix, and the lyrics of most of ours songs are quite offensive if taken seriously. I, myself, wouldn’t go to a Prussian Blue concert, as I know that it would offend me greatly.

        We’ve all had moments in our life as Maggie described: both embarrassing and offensive. I suggest everyone ponder them and reflect on how it changed us as people; hopefully we didn’t let them scar us. If anyone objects to possibly being singled out at random as “the best head giver” for the punk song “good head”, our show is not for you.

      • It’s not as if we’re safe family entertainment.

  23. Maggie says:

    One girl who was completely hammered pointed to me. But we can go with your situation as a hypothetical and, that case, you’re right. Totally respectful and justified.

  24. the truth says:

    If you a dumb, insecure, ugly bitch, then this shit might offend you. If you a smart, confident, beautiful women, then you know that pussy is the most powerful force in the universe.

    • Sam says:

      An interesting take on “the truth”. While I see the direction that you’re coming from, I think that the definition of “ugly” and “beautiful” can be misconstrued by some (as can be seen above) to mean “as compared to porn stars”.

  25. the truth says:

    No one can make you feel inferior without your consent -Eleanor Roosevelt

    If you feel dumb, insecure, and ugly than you are.

    Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. -i don’t know who said that shit so if you think pornstars are beautiful than they are to you

    Truth rules

  26. Jason says:

    Somebody should put on a FILFest, then all will be saved.

  27. Rose says:

    Two things really – I don’t dispute any woman’s right to participate in any event she chooses or to use her body in a way she deems appropriate.
    I do think there is one message I’m seeing in MILFest that makes me frankly a little angry. Before I voice it, I do appreciate the idea of empowering women and allowing mothers to be human beings with lives of their own.
    However, I think that, whether it was intentional or not, using the term MILF – which no one actually thinks means Mothers In Loving Families – sends the message that you only get to be celebrated as a sexual human being and a mom in Denton if you fit into the definition of attractive as set forth in the Dude At A Bar Standard Dictionary.
    The intentions behind this event may have been good, and it at least sounds like they were. But I can’t help but feel that if allowing moms in general a chance to let their hair down and have fun was really the goal, having the vehicle for that fun involve prancing around onstage for everyone else to judge doesn’t seem like the best expression of that goal. At the very least, it sounds like the fun was as likely to be geared to a male audience as to any of the contestants, simply because the idea of a stage event is for there to be someone watching it for entertainment.

    • Look, I’m not gonna lie. I just kinda skimmed what you just wrote. For starters, fine you got me, the whole purpose of the event is to be wild and crazy and have hot moms go nuts and hopefully les-out a little bit (wink wink). But the fact is, the MILFest organization has a tiara, a sash (that says “Queen MILF”) and prizes to give to the winners… Which makes it legit. There’s probably going to be a lot of girls doing things they would rather not have mentioned later, and you can act like a 16 year old who wasn’t asked to the prom and instead of going and having a good time sits around and finds reasons to get rid of the prom and light the school on fire…. or you can attend.

      Here’s the deal. How about one of you feminists enter the contest, and if you make it to the top three I will donate my share of the MILFest cash to a battered women’s shelter. Deal?

      • Richard, I’m just going to tell you point-blank: don’t come back here and comment unless you can fully engage in the conversation. You have now twice admitted that it is too much trouble for you to read a couple of paragraphs from women who thoughtfully and reasonably disagree with you. Refusing to engage with your critics–who are, in this case, women–makes you look far worse than the MILF contest did initially. It makes you look like a willfully ignorant, privileged male who cannot be bothered to address anyone who disagrees with him in any meaningful way. Maybe that’s your punk rock way of doing things, but it reflects very poorly on you, the event, and your band.

        So no, no deal at all.

      • Other people’s opinion of me has never been something I’ve cared much about.

      • You’re pretty hot, I think you’ve got a shot if you can dance well.

      • Sam says:

        I don’t really see what part of that made Richard seem “privileged”. Full engagement in this conversation seems to be a personal preference for all involved. Have you read the paper I linked to? It really is illuminating.

        Also, the trolling seems to be working well, as, if you know much about Punk music, should be expected. As far as the band goes, you should listen to the songs and reflect on that instead of highly polarized internet comments.

  28. Melissa M says:

    I am a female, 23 years old, and I approve of this event. I’m actually really excited to go check it out!

  29. emjaybee says:

    Richard, it’s clear that, like Mother’s Day, you want this thread to be all about you and your wanking.

  30. the truth says:

    The picture chosen for this blog is in poor taste and quite frankly is offensive. It defeats the whole purpose of the bloggers argument. There are pussies out there struggling with bulimia everyday and the blogger chose a picture of a pussy barfing to criticize and persecute an event that clearly empowers the pussy. That picture is demeaning and insulting to all pussies struggling with bulimia everywhere

    • Sam says:

      Good point. I imagine that you are pronouncing it “Pooooosies”. Also, vomiting poosies is a sign of I think something potentially worse (and more contagious) than bulimia.

  31. Amber Lynn says:

    Because of the moronic trolling taking place here, I feel like it should be spelled out that the offending faction here is a-duh: MILF Mom I’d Like to Fuck. The phrase then, is the problem. It goes beyond a regular beauty pageant to say “Hey, I’d hit that!” And it is this concept that breaches the normal degrading function of a beauty contest, and turns the Mother’s you are supposedly celebrating into sexual objects.

    I really enjoy this blog, Andrea you make excellent points and the topics you cover are important.

    I know it is probably a bummer spelling things out for people, but I feel like this discussion was lost the second you put it up, and then again when you responded to their idiocy in anger.

    Losing your temper reinforces their idea of the angry “raving” feminist and they shut their minds to dialogue.

    That being said, trolls are trolls, and it cannot be put upon your shoulders to convert them into respectful human beings.

    Good luck

  32. melissa says:

    Feminism to me is representing who you want to be through self empowerment. If MILF fest isn’t your thing then ok but how are you empowering other women by trashing it?

    It’s a celebration of their beauty, hell after popping out a kid I think these women deserve to say “HELL YEAH I’M HOT”. I personally wouldn’t do it because I am too shy.

    I still don’t see how MILF is a crime. Sure it is a bit crude because it drops the f-bomb but there isn’t anything deeming. The only angle I can see this as an issue from is by assuming men are sexually objectifying women. The women involved though are the ones that get to determine how they perceive themselves. Whether it is a sexually object or a celebration that they are mother and still take pride in themselves. This is the business of the women who choose to be involved and them alone. To everyone else it means something different.

    Sure there will probably be men there that view them as being sexual objects; however, in the assumption all women are just sexual objects in this context that is equally as demeaning. Just because they see the MIL”F” does not mean the woman will succumb to his “lustful stare” and be instantly helpless. Truth is these women aren’t going to allow that to happen because they have pride in themselves, otherwise they wouldn’t of signed up.

  33. the truth says:

    You weren’t born in a test tube. You better be glad somebody thought yo momma was sexy and wanted to hit that.

    Milfest is not only empowering to the pussy its empowering to the whole human existence. It celebrates the primal instincts and urges that enable procreation.

  34. Behold, our Queen…

  35. Kat says:

    Thank god all these people showed up to tell you how wrong you are, Andrea! I’m really grateful to all the men who have so thoughtfully explained how much better informed they are about women’s issues, sexuality and punk rock. Thank you, smart men. Where would we be without you? I’m sure you will now tell me.

  36. Pat Leal says:

    MILF Show 2011 featuring The Wee Beasties Re-Cap Edit… Yes, I had a great time… and yes, I saw women (& moms) having a great time there too.


  37. Pingback: Dallas Cowboys Cheerleader Founds “Breastaurant” Biz | HAY LADIES!

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