Jessica Simpson is a problem?

NBCDFW’s “Blue Star” Dallas Cowboys blog has identified a SRS NEW PROBLEM in professional sports via the Chicago Sun-Times! It’s the “Jessica Simpson Problem.”

Bears’ quarterback Jay Cutler and celebrity girlfriend Kristin Cavallari discussed the relationship between the two and, in doing so, added a sort of jab to Jessica Simpson, ex-girlfriend of Dallas’ Tony Romo.

According to the friend, Cutler and Cavallari “don’t want to have a Jessica Simpson problem.” Simpson was somewhat famously seen in a pink no. 9 Cowboys’ jersey during an ugly loss to the Philadelphia Eagles in December of 2007, and, afterward, was made something of a pariah by fans and the media.

I’m just thinking out loud here, but if you can’t do your job because your girlfriend is pretty, that might be a problem for your girlfriend, in that it sucks to watch someone you love be crappy at their job, but it is not a problem caused by your girlfriend. If you can’t do your job because your girlfriend is pretty, sir, maybe you are just bad at your job.

So let’s rename this thing. “Tony Romo Is A Crappy Quarterback Problem” seems too specific to Dallas, so maybe: “You Have No One To Blame But Yourself For Your Lack Of Professional Sports Acumen Problem.”

Not catchy enough?


About andrea grimes

Andrea is a journalist living in Austin, TX. She has a master's degree in anthropology and did her thesis work on gender and stand-up comedy. Seriously. Also, she has a bunch of cats. Three of them. Is three a bunch? Discuss.
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5 Responses to Jessica Simpson is a problem?

  1. Lara Emily Foley says:

    Here here! Nothing like blaming a woman for a guy sucking at his job. “I wouldn’t have thrown 5 INTs if my girlfriend was a little plainer looking. ” or “We totes would have won that game if only my girlfriend wasn’t just so gosh darn beautiful, wear a paperbag to the next game honey!”

    Losers all of them.

  2. Cocoa says:

    Thank you for the truth..Jessica has been blamed for so much because her boyfriend didn’t have a backbone to tell the truth and take up for her…I believe it was Tony who had his mom give Jessica the darn pink #9 jersey…it wasn’t her idea…I think the NFL
    has ridden on Jessica’s coattails for hits on their links long enough…Jessica has moved on
    so find a new woman to bring you the attention you are lacking…

  3. how is this story still alive? seriously. just, wut?

  4. Pingback: Women Once Again Blamed For The Fact That Tony Romo Sucks At Football | HAY LADIES!

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