Oh good. Another strip club. I’m just dripping with excitement.

Far be it from me to discourage people from getting turned on in their pants areas, but the most depressing thing about this story about a Rick’s Cabaret opening near DFW International Airport is not that Dallas will be home to yet another strip club, but that that whole world–you all are coming to the Super Bowl, right? wanna rent my apartment for the week?–will be greeted in February by what has got to be the world’s most snooze-worthy present iteration of human heterosexuality.

Yes, all of the things you would think would piss me off about strip clubs continue to piss me off–objectification of women, power imbalances, etc.–but the thing that gets me more than anything else these days about the whole mainstream stripper aesthetic is how downright boring and reductive it is.

Strip clubs are the sexual equivalent of saying your favorite band is Train. It’s saying, “Yes, I can’t come up with anything I might like better than this ubiquitous schlock that dictates I and my partner(s) look and behave in certain limited ways.” It’s saying, “Man, that ‘Hey, Soul Sister’ song is some really deep shit.”

This is kind of a reason I love feminism and being a feminist. Eventually, you realize Train is a crappy band and start listening to really interesting things. You start thinking outside the box when it comes to the bedroom (haha! oh my but I am funny.) and see that there’s more to both female and male sexual expression than glitter and Kid Rock songs. Allow me to mix a metaphor: feminism means you don’t have to get off to ‘Drops of Jupiter’ every night.


About andrea grimes

Andrea is a journalist living in Austin, TX. She has a master's degree in anthropology and did her thesis work on gender and stand-up comedy. Seriously. Also, she has a bunch of cats. Three of them. Is three a bunch? Discuss.
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6 Responses to Oh good. Another strip club. I’m just dripping with excitement.

  1. Rob says:

    Andrea we so much in common and yet are separated by such gulfs.

    I was genetically programmed to like looking at boobs. (Programmed by god or evolution is whole ‘nuthter fun discussion) I admit it. They are *awesome*.

    Does that mean I am a misogynist or can ONLY appreciate a women for her boobs. Of course not or I would not have read your whole post. I never have gotten the whole “objectification thing”

    But to strip clubs, if women were not so dog goned selfish about letting us see the boobs we are programmed to want to see there would be no need for strip clubs.
    Someone (probably evil) convinced you ladies though that letting us see your boobs someone diminishes you. Which is odd as most men are very grateful for the view and there are certain chemical reactions that occur in men that bind us to women who let us see.

    Oh sure, there are jerks out there that take pride in diminishing women but most of us really like you. Even if we do like to look at bare boobs from time to time. I really don’t think it makes me a bad person.

    Odd how thinking I am a bad person for liking boobs are a common trait of feminists and religions who DO objectify women. 😉

    • Rob, you are misunderstanding what I’m saying on a fundamental level. I won’t get into your use of “programmed,”but suffice to say I generally think most desires and behaviors are culturally constructed and dislike the idea that we’re all God- or evolution-programmed robots. Moving on: I didn’t (and I don’t think any feminists would do this) say you are a bad person for liking boobs. I’ll assume that you made a sweeping, incorrect generalization about feminists because you really don’t know what they believe, not because you want to willfully misrepresent them to suit your own purposes.

      However: the fact that you make sweeping, incorrect generalizations about women (“so dog goned selfish about letting us see the boobs”) leads me to believe that your lack of access to enthusiastically displayed boobs outside of a strip club setting has more to do with your own negative attitude toward women than with the pathologically boob-withholding behavior of all women as an entire sex. Simply put, many women can tell when a guy thinks he is entitled to her body (or to women’s bodies generally), and it is not a turn on for many of us, feminist or not. Letting someone see my boobs doesn’t diminish me. Letting someone who believes giving me money in exchange for my boobs is his only recourse because women are so withholding and selfish does diminish me–and all women.

  2. Sam M. says:

    I await Robert W.’s response to this post.

  3. Pingback: Pole Dancing For Jesus Throws Sexy Strip Club Paradigm Over Shark | HAY LADIES!

  4. findingmyspice says:

    I am shocked and almost at a loss for words. I am highly educated woman. I love my husband and together we go to strip clubs and have an awesome time. Women are amazing inside and out and I see power of a woman dancing on that pole! I love it! it turns me on and my husband and then we have incredible intense sex. Thank God for strip clubs! I do believe it takes a mature audience to appreciate women and their bodies the way I do and there are major jerks out there that spoil a fun and exciting experience for everyone else. However, we are having fun over here and I LOVE IT!

  5. Pingback: Dallas Cowboys Cheerleader Founds “Breastaurant” Biz | HAY LADIES!

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